We are a loose affiliation of people bound by the belief that people can change. The self is not a static object, but an ongoing project. We reject the despair of permanence. We believe in the friction of becoming.
I. The Dialectic of the Past and Present
The DBT Principle
At the heart of our club is the fundamental dialectic: we must radically accept exactly who we were, while fiercely committing to the work of who we are becoming.
We do not deny our pasts. We acknowledge that we may have once been pieces of shit. We may have lived for New Year's Eve, been selfish lovers, and wrote mean words about people in bathroom stalls. To deny this is to live in delusion.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy teaches us that true transformation requires Radical Acceptance. We look at the absolute worst versions of ourselves without judgment, validate that it happened, and then choose to synthesize a new reality.
II. The Anxiety of the Open Door
The Kierkegaardian Principle
Change is terrifying. As Søren Kierkegaard wrote,
“Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.”
When we realize that we are not locked into our past behaviors (that we are entirely free to choose our next action) we experience dread.
The New Beginnings Club embraces this dread. We understand that stepping away from who you used to be requires an existential leap of faith. The crowd will always remember you as the person you were. They will tell you that people don't change. To believe that you can change is to stand alone in your own subjective truth.
Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.
III. The Sovereign Clubhouse
The New Beginnings Club has no central authority, no dues, and no formal meetings. It is a franchise of the mind and spirit.
A New Beginnings Clubhouse is established the exact moment a person stands in their own space and genuinely commits to the leap of faith. Your living room, your kitchen, your porch, if you hold the belief that human transformation is possible, your roof covers a clubhouse.
IV. The Principles
- I accept who I was without letting it dictate who I am.
- I embrace the anxiety of my own freedom.
- I forgive those who cannot see my change, because I know the truth of my own becoming.
- I believe, unconditionally, that people can change.